Helloooo! Consulting criminal here! The name's James Moriarty, but you, darling dears, can call me Jim. I like long walks on the beach, classical music, and turning people into shoes.

Anonymous said: Sebby is annoyed with me, isn't that cute? -AS

It’s adorable. Your banter is oddly entertaining. I knew someone would get under his skin eventually.

Anonymous said: Fine, just have fun. -AS

You know I always do. 

Anonymous said: Play nicely Jim-jam. -AS

Oh, but playing nice is so stale.

Anonymous said: my teachers all suck. jim will you fix it for me?

Not for free, sweetheart. Your offer?

Anonymous said: Aww, now you've hurt my feelings. Oh well, at least I have my Living Dead Doll collection to talk to. -AS

But I thought we were connecting!


Anonymous said: What if two sexy people called you "daddy"?

I would wonder about their state of mind. Then I’d get over it and give them my number.

Anonymous said: Do you like being called daddy?

Is it that obvious?

Anonymous said: What is considered sexy to you?


A nice face isn’t too bad, either.

Anonymous said: No, I'm not Sherlock. When am I getting that new couch you promised me earlier? I'm impatient. -AS

Oh, you again! I knew I recognized that snark from somewhere. Shame about you not being Sherlock, but oh well. Can’t always get what you want. And as for the couch… hm. I’d say I’m a man of my word, but I’m really not.

Anonymous said: Really? You couldn't think of something original? Idiot. -AS

Oh nooo, have I disappointed you? If I wanted someone to play riddle games with, I’d go looking for Sherlock. Unless of course, you are Sherlock hiding behind that silly gray mask — in which case, feel free to ask the question again, dear!

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